So I woke up this morning, well, I was woken up by lil' man at 5 AM!, and thought, ok today will be a better day. Not so much. I know God's mercies are new every day, but mercy just doesn't feel like enough. I need superhuman strength... and yes, I know He will also provide strength and comfort - honestly, I'm just not feelin' it. I have not walked away from my faith. I have not abandoned God, though I feel abandoned by Him. I just want some peace in my heart and not this daily sorrow. I will continue to pray that this is just a part of walking through grief...not a life-sentence. I do have joy-husband, kids, family, friends...just still am in wonder that this is my life now (and my dad's, sister etc.) that is life without my mom. Inconcievable. Totally.